Sexual, Masturbation and Porn Addiction Help Forum

Update: 4 days of freedom from porn & masturbation by following Jesus Christ.

In Matthew 26:41, Jesus made a statement that contains one of the most powerful keys to overcoming sexual addiction. He said to his disciples, "Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." What an incredibly profound piece of practical and spiritual advice! You may want with all of your heart to be free, but your flesh doesn’t have the strength or will to support the spiritual ideals you aspire to live by. It needs to be guarded from temptation or it will bring you down.

Like most everyone else I read on this Web site, I have experienced the frustrating and utterly bewildering condition of sincerely wanting to stop looking at porn and committing masturbation, but seeing myself fall back into it over and over and over so many times I can’t count them. The Lord Jesus described the condition perfectly: “the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Even though we in our hearts may want to do what is right and wise and healthy, and good in the sight of God, our flesh is weak and susceptible to temptation.

Jesus’ solution: “Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation.” Notice that this solution causes a person to do something for himself (watch and pray), while it also brings God on board in answer to the prayer for His help. People working in tandem with God—what a powerful and winning combination!

What is watching against temptation? For me, in relation to our topic, it is simply staying on guard against whatever stirs me up to look at pornography and commit masturbation. Someone has wisely noted: “He who would not fall down should not walk in slippery places.” Internet porn sites are slippery places of temptation. TV shows with strong sexual content are slippery places of temptation. Strip bars are slippery places of temptation. Magazines containing partial or full nudity are slippery places of temptation. And so on. You get the picture. And let’s not forget images in the mind as well. Fantasies and memories of porn can be as stirring to the weak flesh as physical pictures.

Concerning praying for God’s help against temptation, Jesus gave a simple example in the model daily prayer that he gave us, commonly called "The Lord's Prayer." He included the little phrase, "and lead us not into temptation." God, who knows all things and sees what lies ahead in our paths, is able to steer us away from temptation or provide an escape route so that we are able to overcome it. His power is limitless to help us in any way we need. Jesus taught us to ask for God’s aid, and it is understood that our asking will not be in vain.

I am finding victory using this teaching of Christ and I would welcome anyone else’s comments on how this principle is being used effectively in your life to help you conquer porn and masturbation addiction. God bless you all. I am praying for you.

How long have you been addicted?

Over 10 years.

Just before yielding to this addiction, do you notice what changes within?

Hi.
I just read your post quoting Christ in St Matthew saying "Watch and Pray". These two concepts seem essential. I came to this site because I had just finished a very busy day, finally putting my feet up, by myself, at the computer, and there was the glaring temptation again. Sometimes it hits me so strongly. So I came to this site to fortify myself against the urge.
To watch, to be watchful, to study ourselves. What are our patterns and triggers? How do we willfully recreate the conditions to go back to the addiction? Pray because this is bigger than me, or bigger than I believe myself to be. I'm taking all the help I can get.
Thanks for being there, it really helps me to know that others are in the same predicament and getting out of the same predicament.

Remember the addiction is to the high, the porn or sex rush, and it is also to the low, the self despising, the bitter empty feelings. I can see that after ten years of addiction - in some way I am an addict on both ends.

As adamant has pointed out, there is invariably a trigger or triggers that are tripped that creates the intention to feed the addiction. And that can be so very subtle – sufficient to trigger the sub-conscious where all the memories of the ‘feel good effects’ are stored, served up and replayed.
Before we know it, we’ve committed to following through because we’ve immediately shifted the focus of attention to getting that ‘feel good’ effect.

We need to be aware of those triggers in all their subtle varieties and be ever watchful of them. We need to be detached when we spot them in that briefest of windows of time and consciously let them go so that the sub conscious has no reason to serve them up. In that way, we ‘guard our hearts and minds’. In the course of letting go, I switch my conscious thinking - Philippians 4:8-9

Hi adamant and Steve B,

I find your comments extremely helpful. Especially your insights regarding the need to learn and watch for triggers and patterns of thought and behavior leading one back into porn and masturbation. We really have to get to know ourselves, don’t we? That is a tall order, but well worth the effort.

I also like the way you guys both talked about what to do when you notice a trigger or an addictive pattern starting to form. It’s one thing to notice it and another to do what is needed to overcome it. Adamant noticed himself suddenly tempted while alone at the computer after a very busy day. But what he did after noticing the temptation was crucial to his victory over the temptation, and a textbook lesson for us all. Having noticed the temptation, he immediately went to this Web site, where he knew he could get himself fortified against giving in to the temptation. I don’t know how many times I have failed to do what adamant did when I noticed a trigger and ignored it, then fell prey to temptation and watched as the old addictive pattern played out to its ugly end.

Steve B corroborates the same successful method of detecting the trigger and quickly dealing with it, consciously letting it go and turning the thoughts to anything that is true, good, praiseworthy, etc., as the apostle Paul counseled in his letter to the Philippians. And we can’t toy around with a temptation, but we must deal with it quickly and decisively in that “briefest of windows of time” that Steve described.

Great advice guys. Very helpful and very encouraging.

Enlightening thread. Thanks guys.